Courage
Ashley,
These past few days I can't stop thinking of you. My thoughts of you and my prayers for you become one. Thanks for calling me the other evening. I was glad to hear you tell me that you loved me. Thanks for those words. I was very relieved to hear you tell me that Heather received my email with an open heart. She has since sent me a kind response. I sent mom a copy of the emails I sent to you and Heather. The next morning she called me and asked why you called. I said that you called to tell me that you loved me and to say that Heather received her note from me. She was surprised that I sent the one to Heather. She thought it was a bit over the top. She was even concerned for your job at Hannah's Hope. When I told her that it was well received she said it must have surely been a "God thing." I send email like that all the time but always to people I know more intimately. Even then I sometimes don't have the nerve to push the "send" button. I've never sent such a heart weighted message to anyone as far removed from me as Heather. I wrote it in the morning before my Monday lunch with Mike. During the day I decided not to send it for the same reasons mom gave me for not sending it. In the end before I went to bed I came downstairs and sent it. Fifteen or twenty minutes later you called. The bottom line is I didn't want to send it because I was afraid. I was afraid of looking like a fool and I was afraid of embarrassing you. The thing I'm afraid to do is usually the thing God is inviting me to do. Sometimes you put your heart out there to love someone and it turns out okay. Sometimes it doesn't.
If I understand your plans, you are going to stay in Guatemala until around the end of December. I know you love it there. You love the girls God has given you to minister to. With that in mind let me offer you this challenge. Before I tell you what it is let me say that it will take courage. Let me also remind you of my last email. I said that God doesn't want you in Guatemala to do a work for Him as though He needs you in some way. He has you there so that He can do a work in you. I told Heather much the same thing in the note I sent to her. As you take this journey with Jesus you are going to find that this life is one of constant exchanges. God will ask you, God will invite you to exchange one thing for something else. The "something else" is most often less appealing than what you currently have. The "something else" may make you afraid. In the end you'll do as God asks because you love Him more than what He has asked you to give up. Here's your heart's challenge. Ask God if He wants you to exchange your work in Guatemala for something else. Do you trust Him with such a prayer? Do you have that kind of courage? Could you trust Him to take care of those young women without you? Do you want your heart to remain tender and not jaded? Then you must always keep the most important thing the most important thing. Do you remember what that is?
I have no agenda of my own for you. I'm not telling you these things because I have my own plans for you. I am content and happy for you. You are one of the ways God gives me joy. I'm your dad. I owe you the benefit of my experience on the journey. For your relationship with God to grow and for intimacy with Him to deepen you will have to exchange the good things He has given you for better things that He has prepared. Trusting God is a dangerous business. I dare you to trust Him with your passion.
Call me some time if you get the time.
I love you sweetie,
D
These past few days I can't stop thinking of you. My thoughts of you and my prayers for you become one. Thanks for calling me the other evening. I was glad to hear you tell me that you loved me. Thanks for those words. I was very relieved to hear you tell me that Heather received my email with an open heart. She has since sent me a kind response. I sent mom a copy of the emails I sent to you and Heather. The next morning she called me and asked why you called. I said that you called to tell me that you loved me and to say that Heather received her note from me. She was surprised that I sent the one to Heather. She thought it was a bit over the top. She was even concerned for your job at Hannah's Hope. When I told her that it was well received she said it must have surely been a "God thing." I send email like that all the time but always to people I know more intimately. Even then I sometimes don't have the nerve to push the "send" button. I've never sent such a heart weighted message to anyone as far removed from me as Heather. I wrote it in the morning before my Monday lunch with Mike. During the day I decided not to send it for the same reasons mom gave me for not sending it. In the end before I went to bed I came downstairs and sent it. Fifteen or twenty minutes later you called. The bottom line is I didn't want to send it because I was afraid. I was afraid of looking like a fool and I was afraid of embarrassing you. The thing I'm afraid to do is usually the thing God is inviting me to do. Sometimes you put your heart out there to love someone and it turns out okay. Sometimes it doesn't.
If I understand your plans, you are going to stay in Guatemala until around the end of December. I know you love it there. You love the girls God has given you to minister to. With that in mind let me offer you this challenge. Before I tell you what it is let me say that it will take courage. Let me also remind you of my last email. I said that God doesn't want you in Guatemala to do a work for Him as though He needs you in some way. He has you there so that He can do a work in you. I told Heather much the same thing in the note I sent to her. As you take this journey with Jesus you are going to find that this life is one of constant exchanges. God will ask you, God will invite you to exchange one thing for something else. The "something else" is most often less appealing than what you currently have. The "something else" may make you afraid. In the end you'll do as God asks because you love Him more than what He has asked you to give up. Here's your heart's challenge. Ask God if He wants you to exchange your work in Guatemala for something else. Do you trust Him with such a prayer? Do you have that kind of courage? Could you trust Him to take care of those young women without you? Do you want your heart to remain tender and not jaded? Then you must always keep the most important thing the most important thing. Do you remember what that is?
I have no agenda of my own for you. I'm not telling you these things because I have my own plans for you. I am content and happy for you. You are one of the ways God gives me joy. I'm your dad. I owe you the benefit of my experience on the journey. For your relationship with God to grow and for intimacy with Him to deepen you will have to exchange the good things He has given you for better things that He has prepared. Trusting God is a dangerous business. I dare you to trust Him with your passion.
Call me some time if you get the time.
I love you sweetie,
D
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